Grades

Sometimes when I'm bored, I go on Blackboard and look at my amazing grades. LOL. I used to hate logging into Aires during my highschool year to look at my shitty grades but now I'm in college, I look at them often. Call me a conceited bitch BUT I did worked hard for them. I don't care, I think that it is nice to look at what I accomplished sometimes and have a "me" moment as in "Damnnn I'm proud of myself." Its part of being healthy.

Ugh why do I sound like a dumbass in 2009.... HAHAHAHA.

Sunday Morning rain is falling.... (not really)

I find it difficult to think of a title for each of my post. I don't like thinking about it because I feel like I have to write my post according to what the title suggest; thus leaving me limited room to write whatever the hell I want. Instead, I just want to go straight to writing (which I did). It has been about 8 months since my last post. I was re-reading what I wrote last 8 months and I realized how much a person can change in such a short amount of time (Yes, 8 months is short in my opinion). I am in college now, I guess I can say I have matured :) but at the same time I can say I'm not. Whenever I write something and think that I am mature for writing it, when I look back it's like "Holy shit... Why am I so corny and I sound like I'm trying too hard" But that is just me. Reading what I wrote when I was young makes me cringe. Anyway, lets get back to college. I am currently attending Orange Coast College, proud to say that I am on the Cross Country Team ! Yesterday, we got first place as a team and was Southern California Regional Champions. Now aiming for the State Champion title. God... everyone is so fast on the team. I felt like I haven't contribute much. However, I want to do better and help out as much as I can since everyone is so helpful and nice to me. I realized how important it is to be in a place where everyone is happy to see you and how you are excited to see them. The cross country team is always welcoming towards me, even when I am having a really bad day or bad race (like yesterday... I died out big time). Coach Ochoa walked towards after and said "Good job, Kristie, I know how hard it is out there" and I just teared up. I just felt so bless to be a part of the team. I guess we all have bad days. But that make me want to do better.

I realized a lot of things about myself in the past 8 months. In front of people, I always act happy and act like I have no problems. I tried to put up a front. I guess most people are like that; but in reality, everyone has their own problems that they do not want to talk about.     

College has opened my eyes to a lot of new things. I learned a tremendous amount of stuff that is actually useful for life. For example, human sexuality... I feel like that class and English class (which is also about sexuality) helped better my understand towards not just the subject but also humans. Not that I am obsess about sex and think about sex all the time, but it is something that will inevitably become a part of my life (and most people.) I am more opened about all kinds of sexual orientation as of now: gays, lesbians...basically whole LGBTQ community. I have always thought of them as evil or someone who I can't hang out with  because of my parents' hostile attitudes towards them. Also, I think I was gender confused for a good part of my life. I thought I was a lesbian because I always wondered how come boys seem so annoying to me (with the exception of Jeremy and Kevin). I told Rae about it and she kinda set my straight (hehe...) that I was not one. 

I will end my post with one final note about my college plans. I am currently "attempting" to transfer to a UC in one year. I have been studying like a little nerd that I am for the past 8 months hoping to achieve something cool like ahem... getting accepted into UCB and UCLA. I do have doubts; however, it is a risk I am willing to take. I thought about whether or not I will be happy and Ochoa was talking about relative deprivation. It is either you are a big fish in a small pond and thrive or be a small fish in a big pond and blend in like any other student. The thought of it scares me but YOLO (as Julie Mai would put it). Is going to a big UC worth the money? Will the education be worth its money? How much can I put up? So many questions haunt me, yet I'm not even admitted. Haha. Okay let's not get ahead of yourself now Kristie. Anyway, I will end it  here and will take this Sunday to finish up my homework and start writing my personal statement!     

College....

.... is so stressful ! Well college, but life in general is stressful. So I got rejected from almost all of the UCs I applied to and I am just waiting for UCI now. It is not a very pleasant feeling when you hear all your other friends and how happy they are because they got accepted into this school and that school while you did not. I mean I should be happy for them because they deserved it for all their hard work but I just don't like the feeling of it. Haha ! I guess I will get over it soon but in the moment it hurts. It just made me reflect back on all the extra curriculum that I did and all the time I sacrificed for it rather than focusing on my grades. I do regret joining too many things and taking more things than I can handle but in the end, I still feel happy with what I am doing. I sometimes have doubt about myself. Whether I am good enough or not. However, at the end of the day, I realized that all did not matter. I am proud of myself for what I have accomplished for the past 4 years. I should not be comparing myself to others because I am content with what I have. No matter where I go or where I end up, as long as I work hard and strive to do my best, I will be more than just fine :)

I feel like all the "prestigious" UCs are just a label. Essential, it is just a school that you go to and get an education. What matters is what you get out of it and whether if your experience is worthwhile or not. I mean you can go to UCLA and study the same materials as a Cal State but at UCLA you need to study 24/7 and have no life because you're professor expect you to all be smart. Not only that you have to compete with other students who are pretty smart also which makes you feel like shit because if you can't catch up, you're a goner.

Because once you get a job, no one will care about what school you go to! You just live your life :) as long as you build relationships that last for a long time and are happy with what you are doing, there is nothing more you could really ask for! People that you meet along the way will respect you for your character and talent not a temporarily 30 minutes fame of "oh I got accepted into _____ "

As of right now though, I am considering going to UCR. There are about 3 months left of senior year ! I will definitely want to make the best of it.

Unproductive

Lately, I haven't been very productive. I don't know the reason why... maybe it's senioritis or whatever but I have not done a single thing when I go home. Sometimes I get really tired. I feel like it is because of either dance practice for ASB or track practice. Ever since second semester started, I have not done any Calculus homework and for AP Psych and Civics, I always do my work at the very last minute. I feel like a sloth or a dead potato :( I am so over high school  I just want to graduate. I feel like this is a very habit for me. Everyday I tell myself "Okay Kristie, you will go home and do all your homework and catch up on all your work" But once I get home, I just sit on the computer and watch movies. I just hope my life would not be like this. I hope I will grow out of this stagnant phase soon. I am still in the process of deciding which college to go to. And another thing, I need to really start studying for driver's license test.

I also got bit by a dog today. It made realize how much my family means to me. I went home and told them about how a dog bit me. They got really worry and made such a big deal about it. My mom told my sister to drive me to the hospital and my dad told me to get a shot to prevent infection. Haha. At the moment, I feel like they are being overreacting over little things, but it means a lot to me :) I can see how much they care for me and I really appreciate that. This is why I love my family and it motivates me to do better in school so one day I can repay them ! Family would always have your back no matter what.

Life Lesson 101

Today in English class, our English teacher, Mr. Podesta gave us a life lesson 101. He talked about how in life, you will meet many people and you will have many friends; however, you are only truly blessed and lucky if you have 1 friend that you can tell everything to and trust them 100%. There is not many people out there that have a friend that they can tell everything to so if you are one of those people that has one, consider yourself really lucky and always treasure them and value your friendships :) I agreed with what he said because for me, all I really need is just one person to talk to and have a genuine conversation with. I thought of Jeremy and Kevin right away when Mr. Podesta said that and it made me think about how blessed and lucky I am to have a friend like both of them.

Today, Jeremy kept saying "Kristie, we drifted".... I was kinda annoyed because I was hungry and whenever I'm hungry, I get cranky Haha and it was also because I never ever want to have the thought of us drifting apart. I don't like the thought of it because I had drift away from many friends and it sucks so I just want this friendship to last for as long as...... I actually have thoughts of us drifting apart one day though because I'm graduating this year and Jeremy will still be in highschool and Kevin and I are probably going to a different college.

I wonder what will happen to us. Are we going to talk even after I graduated? Somewhere along the line will we stop making the effort to talk to each other? I am afraid that Jeremy will drift away from me because I will not be at Bolsa and I won't be in ASB with him. Kevin, on the other hand, it will be easier to talk to him since both of us are going to college. However, I have hope that Jeremy will still remember me and when we become adults, we will still keep in contact. Maybe when we're are 25 years old and when we are more mature :) I am willing to wait ! Haha. But for now, I will just enjoy my senior year with both of them as it is coming to an end!

3 MORE MONTHS TILL GRADUATION !! WHOOT !!

3 Years Later

So it has been two years. I think I am going to start writing more on blogspot now. One reason is because almost nobody knows that this exist :) So I can just be myself and write whatever the hell I want!

But on a more serious note. It has been two years and let's just say, I think I have changed in some way or another. Well, I hope for the better of course! I was just looking back at all the posts I made during my freshman year and I have to say.... I was just trying to show how cool I was and trying to get people's attention. I think I was pretty immature back then! Haha. So let's just start fresh and let me introduce myself again. Cheers to a new starting ! :)

Hello, my name is Kristie Son and I am currently 17 years old. My birthday is actually coming up, March 16,  so I will turn 18 soon. I am a senior at Bolsa Grande and I have learned a lot throughout my four years. One of the main thing that I learned is to always treasure your relationships with others. It is super easy to fall out of contact with your friends. One minute you are close friends with them, and the next you can become strangers. I had that happen to me. Somewhere between the relationship, either you or the person stop making the effort and you both stop talking to one another. That is why I promised myself to always value my relationships with other people. 

As a typical teenagers, of course I will care about how much friends I have at school, how I look, and trying to get people to like me. However, I finally learned that all that does not matter anymore. I can truly say that I do not care about popularity at school as much as I care for it when I was a sophomore or junior. All I asked for is a few true genuine friends that I can honestly talk to and trust. And I have all that. I feel like I am very blessed and I would never want to lose those friends ! Although sometimes my pride gets the best of me  and I act like I do not want to talk to them; however, in actuality, I really want their attention! Haha! 

And yes... I do have someone I like. If you know me at school, I hardly shows any emotion toward boys but I am a girl too so boys DO attract me :) But there is this guy that I think I am in like with but I dont think he knows it. Duh ! Typical teenage phase ! Haha I am so going through that phase right now :) But I just can't help it! I think this will be it for today. My first time blogging in a long time. I feel more carefree and relaxed now that I blogged out what I am feeling. Until next time! 

Hi Perky!

2 blogs on one day?
whaaaa-tt?
guys have nippples ?
whhaaa-tt?

yea okay i'll shut up.
anyways, hi mom! :]

hrmm, wednesday this week was cooperation day. [march25]
perkiee came to jordan (:
that was the ugliest day of the week ! :D

after school. saw her walkin by herself [trying to look for me, of course]
Me : VIICCCKIIEEE !!! hugggss !! *arms wide open, armpit too*
Her : O___O *rejects*
Me : ):
She probably thinks my armpit smells, since i.... yeaa..
and by smells, i meant SMELLS GOOD! godammit!

joanne met vickie for the first time :D
wednesday's highlight : Fatties encounter ! GO GO POWERRANGER~~

I couldnt breath for awhile when i saw vickie. Why ?

1. Her voice
2. Her body [thighs and stomach]
3. Her and joanne takes too much space and air. Thats why i couldnt breath (:

Anyways, me, fatty#1, fatty#2, chink, and theresa went to ice cream truck to buy food
surpise surprise .
then theresa went home cuz she doesnt want to spent another second-- no no, another mili-second with vickie.
after that, fatty #2 [joanne] ditched us
so its just the chink, fatty#1, and Ngan :D

we didnt know where to go in the first place.
sat at a randumb spot
teresa sitting there looking chinkie [since it was sunny]
vickie sitting there looking dumb [you, Ngan-wannabe!]
i sat there looking like Bill Gates [counting money] (:

kays fine. i was holding out a bowl to see if anyone comes buy and drops a coin in there
):

anyways we talked, the convo was hilarious,forgot what its about tho.
probably just talkin smack among us :)

then we went to Burgur Kang! BK babY ! ^______^
we were screwing around in there for a while, then was about to get kicked out
but the manager pittied us, hobos [cuz we didnt have anywhere to go]
we had a drawin competition-ish, where i drew my signature pig and toast (:
then sister called
she was acting up and had a tandrum.
i had to go home
-________________________-
hehehe, she was pretty pissed off.
BUT NOT pissed off to the point where she left me in the middle of the freeway....
:[
okay, she did D: